woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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