Who wears a wallet chain?!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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