i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
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Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
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You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
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