i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
