My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize