So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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