if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
