I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
