Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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