You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
