don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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