she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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