Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Your cock deserves a montage
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
