one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
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