Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
