I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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