im having a threesome with these popsicles
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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