This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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