i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
what day is it and did you see me today?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
