brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
