My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
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