Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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