hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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