Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'

  (708): View more from Illinois

  such a stalker...

  (248): View more from Michigan

  she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.

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  (248): I prefer the term 'tenderly watching' (708): such a stalker... (248): she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet. http://tfl.nu/m7cj
  Replies (2) Good night (1497) Bad night (950)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever

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  (847): stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever http://tfl.nu/se2n
  Replies (47) Good night (6927) Bad night (999)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup

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  (773): legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup http://tfl.nu/hm49
  Replies (15) Good night (738) Bad night (6901)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  There was a lot of him and a little penis

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  (520): There was a lot of him and a little penis http://tfl.nu/hz43
  Replies (57) Good night (660) Bad night (6576)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.

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  (361): I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness. http://tfl.nu/49ei
  Replies (11) Good night (1382) Bad night (3988)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees

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  (360): He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees http://tfl.nu/gf2k
  Replies (19) Good night (4986) Bad night (2759)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.

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  (414): in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself. http://tfl.nu/j69f
  Replies (5) Good night (4010) Bad night (1698)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.

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  (305): If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals. http://tfl.nu/sngt
  Replies (4) Good night (1244) Bad night (710)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.

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  (+44): I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches. http://tfl.nu/i131
  Replies (6) Good night (1409) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.

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  (515): I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that. http://tfl.nu/ig7j
  Replies (7) Good night (1468) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.

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  (609): Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel. http://tfl.nu/x8kg
  Replies (24) Good night (1037) Bad night (467)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.

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  (570): Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window. http://tfl.nu/lqfg
  Replies (10) Good night (443) Bad night (1349)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.

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  (518): hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person. http://tfl.nu/wx7g
  Replies (2) Good night (1006) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.

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  (303): Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up. http://tfl.nu/afn3
  Replies (6) Good night (1075) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.

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  (508): I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava. http://tfl.nu/8g6j
  Replies (0) Good night (492) Bad night (323)

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