i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.