So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
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that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
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To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.