Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
