my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
The beer is more important than you right now.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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