Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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