Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Randomize
