when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
