You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
