I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
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Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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