This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
