i permit you to call me
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
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