I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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