just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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