I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
