Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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