8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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