I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize