Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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