I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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