Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize