hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize