i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
