so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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