Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
