Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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