Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize