i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
