I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
