I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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