he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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