So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
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We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
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Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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